... because I'm not, and I'm trying to decide how I feel about that.

We're in a bit of an editorial slump at the moment--we're coming down from the hysteria of one crazy project and the next is in the planning stages. A lot of red pens are capped right now.

Down time, which can be fairly enjoyable for a season, has become excruciatingly boring. It is in this time that, at first, I enjoy the freedom to check the news once an hour and catch up on my blog reading; but it is in this same time that I eventually realize the news isn't changing fast enough to keep my interest and my blogging friends aren't as consistent as they should be (hint, hint). The privilege of at-work surfing is becoming about as tedious as a regular, work-related task would be--and probably worse, since it comes without the purpose that succeeding at my job might bring.

So with down time comes a little peace and some usually-frowned-upon goofing off... the peace is nice, but there is some element of guilt that tags along with the goofing off. I guess I could do something more work-related with my time... like, say, start memorizing the dictionary or diagramming sentences for fun. (Aside: I know I'm a geek because neither of those sounds that horrible to me.)

But really, if there's nothing to do, why does my laziness have guilt attached? It isn't my fault. Maybe it's a few Proverbs... e.g., "A lazy man hates work." "A lazy man loves sleep." And maybe a little Colossians (i.e., "whatever you do... do it for the Lord..."). I wonder if there's an exception to the rule. Besides, I'm pretty good at lazing around for the Lord. I do it every day when I don't make Him the first priority in my life. And when I choose to gossip instead of encourage. And when I ignore the opportunities He gives me to take the easy way out.

Anyway. In 8 minutes I'm going to get my things together and ditch this cubicle... only to return again in too-few hours to repeat the monotony of this day tomorrow. But maybe I can be a little less lazy about how I use my time... or maybe not.

Labels: work

Giving Thanks, Day 2

I'm safely at my brother's and happily surrounded by my family. We've been lying around for hours now, accomplishing nothing but much rest, much eating, much laughter. I've whined a bit about feeling not so perfect today, but on the bright side, at least I have my mother here to pet my head. Dad's working on his Bible study at the kitchen table, which means we all have to listen to him read out loud one passage or another as he finds it interesting. Allison's playing really loud music, Daniel's farting everywhere, and the dogs are driving each other crazy. But everyone's happy.

So here's day 2. I'm going to go with...

+ Lisa and Jill
They're my two best friends--each of them so much like me and yet very little like each other. Jill helps me to be rational and make smart decisions, and Lisa listens to and knows my heart. I don't know what I'd do without either of them.

+ My job
I'm so blessed to have a job that I love in a great place with amazing friends. It's secure, it's rewarding, I enjoy it, and the people I work with are some of my closest friends.

Time to take the kids to Blockbuster. Back tomorrow.

Labels: friends, holidays, thankfulness, work

I finally finished reading the last chapter of the chemistry book that's been eating my brain away at work lately. There's actually a picture of Humpty Dumpty in that ridiculous book.

Emily's wedding is this weekend. I can't believe it's here! I've had a thousand things to do, but I'm starting to feel ready. In the spirit of timeliness, I burned myself with the curling iron on Sunday and have a nice hickey-looking mark on my neck.

Check out this right brain/left brain test. I can only see her spinning clockwise, but most of my friends think she's spinning counterclockwise. We were all looking at the same screen this morning trying to decide which of us were crazy.

Hey, I think fall might really be here!

Labels: friends, work

For the first time in quite awhile, I'm really content with my life at the moment. I'm happy and cozy. Things are good. More stuff makes me smile than makes me frown, and that's reason enough for me.

Things at work are good. Work is picking up and I'm starting to feel stressed again occasionally. This might seem like a bad thing, but really it's not. It makes me feel useful. It's good to feel like I have purpose at work. And keeping busy all day certainly makes the 8 hours of cubicle living go a whole lot faster.

Things at church are good. The Walk is growing so much lately. There are new people there every week, and, imagine this--they've even been coming back. It's been fun making new friends, and it's so exciting to go out to dinner and ask for a table for more than 20 people. Well, it's not so exciting for the servers, but it is for us.

Things at home are good. I signed a contract last week and I'm on my way to being a homeowner. In approximately one month I'll no longer be throwing away money on rent or owing an insane portion of my salary to the city of Delaware (grrr!). I'll be 2 miles from work, 5 miles from church, and way-fewer miles from various friends. If you want to help paint, you just let me know and I'll put a roller in your hand.

I'm reading a book Austin gave me. It's called The Mother Tongue and it's about the English language. I haven't been in the mood to read in ages, but I'm eating this up. It's so interesting, minus the few pages I just trudged through about evolution of man (regarding how speech and language came about). Hooray for getting back my passion for non-work-related reading!

I'm happy. Happy!

Labels: books, work

I have lots of family. The regular kind, the church kind, the friends kind. But today I was thinking about another family I have--an unlikely one--and that's my work family.

For a lot of people, work is just work. It's what they have to do to pay the bills. A lot of people hate it. Some people, if they're lucky, don't mind what they do too much. And a few people, if they're lucky, actually enjoy their work.

I fall into the last category--I truly love my work. There have been moments when I've been frustrated or annoyed, but I've never questioned that publishing was where I was intended to be. And there have been some crazy times in our department, but things have leveled out amazingly well in the last few months, and I just love it.

I was gone for three weeks for the surgery, and I was surprised to realize just how much I really missed the people I work with. They aren't just co-workers, but so many of them are real, true friends. The kind that make you smile inside.

Today as we were all sitting around the lunch table (note: we eat together every day as a department, and our table is starting to get really huge), Steve pulled out a big bag of chips that Kathy knew he liked and had brought him from a trip (how cute is that?). He ripped open the bag and tossed it in the center of the table, and everyone grabbed some and we all shared. Family-style lunch! It made me smile, and laugh, and even say, "oh, I love it here!"

Family is special, whether it's the real thing or not.

Labels: family, friends, work

Yesterday was my first day back to the office. I'm excited to be back in the swing of things, even though I haven't made it through a full day yet.

I had my post-op visit on Tuesday and found out Junior was benign and contained hair, teeth, bones, and brain tissue. The brain-tissue thing surprised me, but now I think it's pretty cool. The doctor didn't have pictures yet, but he said he would get them eventually. I can't wait to see!

Although I'm glad to be back at work, the exhaustion is causing me to miss social engagements. Blast!

Labels: surgery, work