June 25, 2007

10:07 PM: it's only the world

Last night I did nothing, and it felt pretty good. Tonight I did nothing, and it felt pretty lousy. Darn it. I thought maybe this park-it-on-the-couch-with-potato-chips thing was going to be the answer, but I guess not.

I'm not having a sad night... I'm having an irritated one. I'm irritated with myself for being in a funk and not getting myself out of it. I'm irritated that I can't just buck up and deal with the crap in my life instead of being sorry for myself and ignoring the problem. Truth is I'm tired of feeling crappy. What is the answer?

I guess it's time to start being honest with myself and stop pretending like he (and she) never existed. I guess this isn't a healthy way to deal with it, because I'm starting to hate myself a little more every day. I'm a mess and it's time to pull it together.

Tomorrow's my birthday, so I guess it's a good day to decide to have a new start. Right? This was a rough birthday-to-birthday year for me. It saw not one, not two, but three breakups. Two with Rob, one with Mr. Never-Existed... it's been exhausting. Maybe when Mom told me this would be my year, she meant my birthday-to-birthday year. Year 28. Maybe my good stuff starts tomorrow.



3 Responses to “it's only the world”

  1. # Blogger Rachel Starr Thomson

    Hey! Happy birthday. I just saw your intro on the FCW list... obviously, I've been a little behind ;). Anyway, welcome to the group.  

  2. # Blogger Erin

    Happy birthday, Shannon :)  

  3. # Blogger Amanda, Ian, and Addison

    Happy Birthday from one June baby to another!  

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About Me

    Name: Shannon
    Age: 29
    Occupation: Editor
    Identity: Child of God
    Location: Ohio
    Yahoo: shann_79


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